I am certain that you would be amazed at how capable you are. Numerous people throughout history who were considered pioneers in any industry were told that their pursuit was impossible. You would also be surprised to know that many of these pioneers discovered their true potential after experiencing “crippling” defeat. When faced with a major challenge they chose to look within themselves for a solution rather than be defined by their failures. The “right” challenge can be out the best in us. You find out what you are made of. True leaders find the opportunity in challenge and are better for it. Failure is one of the best growth opportunities. A common character trait in successful people is that they have a relentless belief in themselves. You can pray all day, repeat positive affirmations and read all types of motivational books. If you don’t have “unwavering” faith in yourself and your abilities, your dreams are “born” dead. I don’t care what you did or didn’t do, you can never ever allow your “track record” to determine your capability for astounding success. Be the narrator of your own story.
There is no greater education than self education. If you know how to read and have access to the internet, there is virtually no topic that you can’t learn more about if you are willing to do the research. Become obsessed about learning everything that there is to know about the topic that is directly related to your issue. As humans, we have the ability to not only learn,but recondition our thinking. We can grow in our awareness of our mindset and take conscientious steps to alter our outlook toward ourselves and our world. The self help industry is built on this fact. The more we educate ourselves, the more empowered we are, therefore, our self doubt diminishes.
Practice,Practice,Practice to Sharpen Your Skills
Once you have educated yourself , carve out time to practice what you have learned about the topic. Don’t make excuses. I don’t care if it’s 10 minutes a day. Do something. Consistent practice builds habit. Once you have developed a habit, it becomes second nature. Your subconscious is altered. You become naturally more confident about yourself and your abilities. At that point, you will officially be stronger. You will have developed a stronger work ethic. You can build a better for yourself once you accept responsible to do the work necessary to build your esteem.
Celebrate Taking Small Steps
Going back to what I wrote about earlier concerning carving out practice time. Rome wasn’t built in a day. You must become your biggest cheerleader. Celebrate and congratulate yourself often. You will have chosen to not only identify ,but to take the necessary steps to slay your own mental and emotional “demons”. Decide to participate in making the life that you truly desire happen rather than have life “happen” to you. In this world, that is a rare character trait. You will officially be separated from the herd. This is worth celebrating.
Imagine What Success Would Look Like
Catch a vision. What does success look like to you? Engage your five senses. How do you feel? Whose with you? Your subconscious doesn’t know the difference. Act as if your desired reality IS your reality. Have fun with it. Stop taking yourself so seriously. You are infinite ,eternal all powerful being simply having a human experience. You are a creator.Your thoughts become the “things” that appear in your life. Each day you are awakening more and more to this fact. In other words, you got this!!
Never Be Afraid to Start or Fail
Did you know that successful people tend to fail more than unsuccessful people? The difference is that successful people interpret failure differently. They get scared like anyone else, but they don’t allow that fear to define them. They move forward anyway gravitating towards success.
For a long time , I was afraid to step out of my comfort zone and start a business. I was afraid to fail. I would ask myself,”What about my family?”, “What will they think?”,”Will I be able to provide for them?” or “What if we end up homeless?”.
In 2014, I had a major turning point. I was fired from my job. I spoke up during a staff meeting in defense of my coworkers. The CEO asked everyone at the table their opinion about what I shared. Everyone who spoke agreed with me. This was a problem. The CEO felt as if I had usurped her authority. I had to go. Some of her last words to me were ,” If you don’t approve of my leadership style, go find your own job as a CEO.” This interaction occurred over five years ago. The sequence of events that directly transpired changed my life for good. The sequence was as followed:
- Lost job., 2) Wife lost job., 3) Couldn’t find new job. 4) Spent all of savings, 5) Had to give up our apartment, 6) Homeless…. for 2 years.
Within those 2 years were marital issues , deep depression, emergency rooms, drugs and contemplation of suicide( I was ready to die or at least I thought I was).
My challenges have and continue to shape me. I learned many valuable lessons from my experiences that will stay with me for life. The two main lessons that are:
- It is never the end of the world.
I thought it was until the next day came.. and the next… etc. The world didn’t end , but how I viewed it did. Regardless of how catastrophic life may seem at any particular moment, it never stays that way. Life goes on with or without you. As long as you are breathing , keep moving forward without regrets. You can’t change what happened. Learn from it and move now.
2. I can’t make anybody love or like me.
I lot came out during those two years. I didn’t know if we were gong to make it. What about our kids? It was a hot mess. I was devastated . I thought I had failed everybody. What about all of the years of grandiose ideas and get rich quick schemes? Where did we end up? Homeless living in the hood. It was never my intention. Nevertheless, there we were. I was beyond embarrassed. I felt as if I had failed as a husband, father,provider and man. What was I good for? Why was I here? I asked myself those questions. There was no answer. I had to make up my own. I had to encourage myself. It was out of this space that I started this blog. I wasn’t going to allow my immediate “outside” environment to determine my self worth. I started this blog and wrote my first book ,partly, to prove to myself that I was greater than my circumstances. I searched within myself to find the strength to give to others despite my challenges. It no longer mattered whether or not someone believed in me. I believed in myself. That is enough. I remain a “work in progress”. Always progressing… Let’s move!!