I am a perfectionist. Exactly, what is a perfectionist? The definition that I choose is a person whose tendency is to demand of others or of oneself an extremely high or even flawless level of performance, in excess of what is required by the situation. Yup!, that can be me all day. Because of this tendency, I can be my own self critic. This can cause me a lot of unhappiness because I create these unrealistic expectations of myself. I might compare myself to others and their accomplishments. This thought process creates a perception of not being good enough. It is a lie. I am now and have always been enough. You are too.
You and I are works in progress, but guess what??! There is no arrival. There is always progress to be made. True joy is found neither in the accomplishment nor reaching the destination. The true joy is in the journey and the experiences along the path. How do you get the most out of the journey? Stay present and be patient with yourself . Learn to take a deep breath and enjoy the moment, one moment at a time. I have been learning this lesson the hard way. That’s okay. It’s all good. Doesn’t always seem that way, but it always seems to work out , one way or the other. It takes time. Being patient can be a real bitch! Practice, practice, practice… It’s still all good though..
I slipped on the stairs at home a few weeks ago. I tore my patella and found out that I had to have surgery. I was not expecting that at all. It was excruciating. I will be out of work for possibly 2 months , if not longer. I have to depend on others to help me. This uncomfortable for me. As both a husband and father, I believe that it is my responsibility to provide for my family and take care of them. Some might call that type of thinking outdated. I don’t care. I am just being honest. I do not like relying on others and I especially don’t like being vulnerable. I want to be completely healed “yesterday”. Tomorrow is not even fast enough. Either way, life goes on. I am forced to be patient with myself. I keep playing back in my mind what I could have done differently to have avoided that situation. It doesn’t matter. This is where I am at. So be it. I am determined to grow from it. With patience comes strength. I will emerge from this situation better and stronger.
Don’t beat yourself up no matter how many times situations don’t seem to work as you planned. Become a lifelong learner of both good and bad experiences. Be determined to consistently learn, implement and grow. You are not competing against anyone. Don’t let anyone tell you differently. Attitude is extremely important. Choose to have the most positive one possible. It a discipline to decide to be happy by mentally capitalizing on the good that you experience, no matter how big or small. Expect the best outcome while honing in on the positive right where you are at. This practice is key to building patience. We each have are own emotional buttons, but we don’t have to be defined by them. Your emotional state does not determine who you are, you do. Be patient. Until next time…